Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Raw Emotion....

So sorry I haven't been blogging much lately. My heart isn't much into it, I guess. We all have heavy, heavy hearts here because of Ken. He is resting comfortably in the hospital now. He is able to visit with friends and family. My nephew flew back from CO today, where he was taking a mini ski vacation. I am so, so thankful that he made it back before anything happened. Since I'm not such great company right now, I think I'll just take a bit of a break from blogging, unless I get inspired to make some cards and take some photos one of these days.


The job front (my husband's) has also got me down. For a long time now, I've been in pretty good spirits about everything and fairly hopeful. I guess today I don't feel so hopeful anymore. I am confident there will be a better tomorrow, but for now, this is how I feel. I'm just being honest with you. I'm sure Ken has alot to do with how I am feeling about everything else going on in our lives, so I just have to let it play itself out. I'm not one of those people that can blog or go about daily life pretending nothing is wrong if there is something wrong. Some people can do that, but I have never been one of those people. I wear my heart on my sleeve, and that's just the way I was wired. I can't apologize for the way God made me. I'd rather be a feeling person than a person that doesn't show emotion when they're hurting. I don't put on facades very well. It just is what it is. So, that's the reason your getting all this raw emotion today.


I promise to keep you abreast of Ken condition. Just keep the prayers coming, for both Ken and Jayne, and for their boys, Andrew and Matthew. They are taking this very hard.


Thanks for your understanding and loving me regardless of whether or not I share a card with you each day.

Hugs,
Amy

Jesus is the gatekeeper to eternal life....

31 comments:

  1. Awww, Amy....sounds like you could use some hugs and prayers. Take care of yourself, you are dealing with a lot right now. Wrap your arms around your fabulous hubby and boys and use their strength. Sorry your having a tough day....cyber hugs to you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. i'm with you. life SHOULDN'T go on as if nothing's happening when something IS, so you do whatever you need to do to be in the moment.

    i'm sorry to need clarification, but is Ken resting comfortably because there's nothing else they can do for him? if you don't feel like elaborating, that's completely fine.

    know that you're being held by the everlasting arms (Deut. 33:27) and He understands.

    no cards necessary...just keep us posted. praying...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Amy,
    Thank you for letting us in on the pain in your life. . .it's easier to cope when you can "let it out". And even though I don't "know" you, I've come to "know" you and therefore care about you and your family. Please allow the peace Christ promises and the love God so freely gives absorb into your soul during this painful time. We cannot begin to comprehend and understand His plan, but by Faith we know it is perfect.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Amy, rest asured I love you regardless.

    Is Ken at Inova Fairfax? Is Ken your husband's brother? Or his sister's husband? Either way, my prayers for his comfort and your peace of mind are ongoing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. It's ok! Sometimes we are not into it. My prayers are with you and your family. I thank God for the peace that passes all understanding for you and your family. I haven't blogged since August although I blog hop. It is a job keeping up with your own personal blog. My mom was diagnosed with renal cancer last March and had her kidney, spleen and part of her pancreas removed. She then underwent chemo and radiation to find out in Sept. that the cancer spread to her lungs and liver. She passed the day after thanksgiving. I have kept your BIL in my mind believing God for a miracle. Please continue to share even if you don't have any cards cause there are some of us that are praying for you and your family.

    Sending you a cyber hug.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Amy.. so sorry to see you so down. It's so hard when loved ones are so ill and you're so far away and feel so helpless. Keeping your family in my prayers and also praying that your hubby finds full time work soon. God Bless you and yours.

    ReplyDelete
  7. My thoughts and prayers are with you and all of your family. I am thinking of you. Walk safely with the Lord!
    Hugs from Michigan

    ReplyDelete
  8. Amy, all of your readers will miss you while you are on a break, and we will be here when you return.

    May God bless your family with His presence and His peace.

    barb

    ReplyDelete
  9. My prayers are with you and your family....
    Judy Tuttle

    ReplyDelete
  10. Praying for Ken.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Amy...you're not alone, sweetie!!! Seems like lots of us are walking through the fire..can't you smell the smoke on most of us? So when you cry out, most of us hear the same pain that we feel. It may not be health, but loss of jobs, or any number of heart wrenching reasons, but we cry in one voice...like the Israelites! So Sister, move over, I'm right beside you.

    ReplyDelete
  12. (((Amy))),

    I am so sorry to hear that Ken isn't doing well. I will keep him in my prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  13. .......giving you a big "hug!" I am keeping you and your family in my prayers......hang in there Amy!

    ReplyDelete
  14. My heart is heavy for you, Amy. It's a blessing to know where Ken will spend eternity, but a bittersweet one because you will all miss him so much. There's not much anyone can say, except "I understand". God bless you & lift your spirits!

    ReplyDelete
  15. {{{Amy}}} don't apologize for how you are feeling. Showing your emotions is who you are and I'd hate to see you change or cover up. That's not you.
    I'm sorry that you are so down right now but I do hope you'll keep the faith and know there will be a better tomorrow.
    Thinking of you all and sending prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Praying for you and your family, dear Amy!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Sending prayers and hugs your way. I can so relate to having hopeless days. Here's to those going by quickly and the happier ones sliding in. Hope you can feel the peace and comfort and hope that only He can provide.

    ReplyDelete
  18. I read your blog every day as I love the cards you make but I have never posted before. I feel today is a good time. You, your family, Ken, and his family are in my thoughts and prayers. Cancer is not a fun thing to deal with and watch as your loved one struggles. I lost my aunt right before Christmas to a 3 year battle with ovarian cancer. She always said I am just floating and always reminded us to keep the faith. The thing that helped me get through it was that she was not suffering anymore but in a better place where all her pains were gone!

    I hope that Ken continues to rest comfortable and is able to enjoy all the time he has with his family!!

    God Bless you and your family,
    Kris

    ReplyDelete
  19. No apologies necessary for your tender heart. So sorry you're hurting. I know that Jesus is right at your side as well as at Ken's. He will keep you close as you all go through this. Bless you.
    Jen

    ReplyDelete
  20. My heart goes out to you and your family. I am like you I can't hold everything in and pretend nothing is wrong. You take all the time you need. We will be hear whenever you can blog again. Prayers and hugs to you and hope all is well again soon.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Amy we all love you because you share. Take good care of yourself. Keep the faith - you may not think it but you are a good advert. Love Janine

    ReplyDelete
  22. I am praying you can feel God's peace in the midst of the storms in your life. Keep in His Word daily to strengthen yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Amy,
    My prayers are with Ken and his family as well as yours.
    No need to apologize for the way you feel....
    Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  24. God bless you... I join you in prayer for you & your family. Know that you'll be missed when you can't blog, but also that we understand. {{hugs}}

    ReplyDelete
  25. Amy, you're not just about cards to us, but you're a real human being, a sister in Christ who is struggling with some mighty big burdens at the moment. (In fact, one of the things I love about your blog, and that sets it apart from so many other card-making blogs in my heart is that you give us bits of your real life along with your creations.) I know God has His arms around all of you right now. I know you know that, too, but sometimes it's just so hard to feel them. He understands. He knows this isn't easy for any of you. I know God hates death so much because of the pain it causes the people left behind, even when we know our loved ones have gone to be with Him. It means separation, and that hurts. A lot. That's why part of what Jesus did on the cross (and by His resurrection) was defeat death. But right now, you hurt, for Ken and his family, for yourself (because you love him and them so much), and it's okay to feel it, to wear it on your sleeve. Know that you have a whole bunch of brothers and sisters praying for y'all. We do love you even if the only contact we ever have with you is reading your blog. Hold on tight to God, even if you get mad at Him for now. He'll still be there when you're ready.

    Love you, sis (in Christ)!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Amy,

    I agree with all of the thoughts already posted. One thing I want to add: There are a lot of blogs with beautiful cards and I read some of them. Many don't ever share anything personal - they are all about the cards. I look at them infrequently. But your blog is the first that I check every day BECAUSE you include the personal. Yes, your cards are beautiful, but it is also fun to "get to know you" a bit through your writing.

    In Christ's love,
    Laura

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm uplifting all of you in prayer, Amy. Do whatever is best for you. We don't expect pretty cards every day. The majority of us come here, because you're such an open & real person and we've come to care about you. While I appreciate your beautiful cards, I appreciate the beautiful person you are even more.

    Hugs,
    Shelly

    ReplyDelete
  28. Oh Amy, it just breaks my heart to hear that you are hurting so. I too am someone who wears my heart on my sleeve. I love your heart and your true honesty. You have been such an encouragement to me and I hope that I can do the same for you. I pray that God continues to give you encouragement as you journey through these tough times. You and your family will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. We will definitely miss you here in blogging land but know that we understand completely.

    ((BIG HUGS))
    Stephanie

    Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
    --Proverbs 3:5

    ReplyDelete
  29. Amy,
    You never have to apologize for your feelings, they are a part of what makes you, you...... a perfect creation of God. We love you for who you are! Sending love and hugs your way in hopes that it brings you some comfort in your time of sorrow. As the song says 'Everybody hurts sometimes'. (I just wish I knew by who).

    {{Hugs}}
    Anita

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hang in there girl. We love you and are praying for you!

    ReplyDelete
  31. I am sending you lots of hugs and lifting you and your family up with prayers.
    (((HUGS))))

    ReplyDelete

Blog Widget by LinkWithin